How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize