you would pick up someone in the library
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
