I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
