if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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