you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize
