i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
