i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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