living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize