why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
