Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize