There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
