Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize
