I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
