our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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