Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Randomize
