yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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