going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Randomize
