Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
