I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
