he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
