the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
