Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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