Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
