My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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