She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize