I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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