I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
