Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
