he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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