im drinking this country out of the recession.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
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