I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
