yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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