I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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