I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
