My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
