I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
