her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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