so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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