i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
