dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
P.S. I can't hear my feet
the day after is always just damage control
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
