You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
