Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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