He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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