No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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