i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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