I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
