A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
These tits shall not be calmed
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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