uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
