I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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