I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize